Let me start by saying how wonderful Target is and how no mother could live without its giant red carts, crazy good deals, and endless home goods cuteness. However, I witnessed a conversation the other day that Target and Elf on the Shelf folks might want to know about. I dropped all of my kiddos […]
The Fear of Becoming My Mother
My mother has a song for everything. By trade, she’s an elementary school music teacher, but she has loved music her whole life. No matter the situation, she can break into the perfect song to match the occasion. When I was a teenager, her songs sent me diving under restaurant tables in total embarrassment. […]
Rewriting My Story
A few years ago, I thought I had life and career and marriage and motherhood all figured out. Feel free to laugh. I was the classic example of “Man plans, God laughs.” When my story changed drastically, it was hard to accept at first. My original life plan was gone, and in its place was […]
Lobster Murder 101
There are few things my husband Jeff enjoys more than a delectable fresh seafood dinner, preferably starring a big, juicy lobster. Long ago, we gave up the idea of going to restaurants that don’t serve us from a drive-thru window. We have three kids, and two of them are wild boys whose idea of a […]
Next Time, Try Girls’ Night IN
You hear the hype about GNO everywhere. Girls’ Night OUT, y’all! Woohoo! Dinner at a cute place! Yummy pink drinks! No kids! Dancing or singing karaoke! Dusting off the few remaining “I’m not THAT old” clothes in your closet. Heels? Maybe… Recently, my book club planned a girls’ night IN. Y’all, we had a slumber party, and it […]
Dear Online Grocery Shopping…Where Have You Been All My Life?
Two big box stores in town are now competing for my online grocery shopping business, and I may never darken the door of a store again. Y’ALL. All I had to do was get on the computer and add items to my virtual shopping cart. Did I mention, friends, the cart is virtual? No one is asking to go to the […]
Carrie On Y’all’s Redneck Therapy Session
People handle stress in many ways…some see counselors or therapists, some exercise, some drink or do drugs. Some people talk about their problems, and others lock their pain away deep inside. To relieve stress, I write, cook, or do something crafty (sometimes with a drink in hand)… But sometimes I make questionable decisions to lighten […]
The Mom-Olympics: Settling “Mompetition” Once and for All
Okay, moms, you know it’s out there. Mompetition. It’s a noun. It’s that guilt, that urge you feel when someone is mothering their little progeny better/craftier/more patiently/cuter/WTH…did they just step out of a magazine…than you are. Mompete is a (sort of) verb. It’s the time when you choose to craft/cook/volunteer/say yes…against all better judgment because you don’t want […]
The Wizard of Oz and Motherhood
In 1939, Dorothy Gale (Judy Garland) rode her Kansas farmhouse through a tornado, landed it right on top of the Wicked Witch of the West, and tap-danced her sparkly ruby slippers down the Technicolor yellow brick road to find the Wizard of Oz so she could get home. On the way, she met the Scarecrow, […]
To the Parents on the Sidelines at Kids’ Sports…
Recently at my son’s baseball park, I broke up the argument (near-fistfight) of two dads whose panties were in a wad about something that had happened on the field during their 6-year-old sons’ game. I told them they could beat each other silly, but to please take it to the parking lot so every kid within a […]
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